Have you ever witnessed a tragic car accident; one where cars are flying in all sorts of directions without any regard for human life and jeopardizing the very life that we live? Well, if you have seen an accident of this magnitude and stuck around until the fire department got there moments later, you might have seen then use a wonderful and life-saving tool very appropriately titled “The Jaws of Life.” These are tools in which the first responder stabs into a wrecked car door and by his own force is able to pry apart car doors, roofs, trunks, anything that will help free the helpless victim stuck inside. Where do you think the inspiration for such a ridiculous invention came about? Well, let me answer that for you. The Jaws of Life were a “Spinoff”, as Tega Jessa states in her article titled “Benefits of Space Exploration”, from the very instruments used to pry the Space Shuttle from its booster rockets. This may not intrigue you or implore you to continue on discovering the affects that NASA has had on our technological advances over the years, but let me tell you, Jessa shared a link to NASA’s Spinoff section which so proudly displayed the technology that has come about and has been inspired by their goals of sending humans into space. I was quite perplexed while reading this as the list goes on and on…
But you may also ask yourself, “is the cost that all this newfangled technological advancement comes with worth it?” Answering that question will be the sole purpose of this paper, and while doing so I hope to maintain a non-biased opinion on the matter because while entering into this research I was in the mindset of many Americans in thinking “why go blow all of our money outside our own orbit when there are people sleeping on the streets eating garbage?” But some of the research that I have conducted has proven quite promising. However, some of the methods that scientists are proposing that we achieve greater distances in space seem rather pricey, but at what cost are we willing to better ourselves as a society? At what point will we decide that the welfare of our families is more important to us than achieving new heights in the realm of space?
The first paragraph is catchy, but the second may need some help. I'm not sure if you should blatantly say what the paper is about. Maybe you should beat around the bush and kinda give a hint of what your focus will be. maybe not.
ReplyDeleteI think this is an awesome introduction. The first sentence made me want to read more. You incorporated your findings into this very well.
ReplyDeleteGreat introduction, as it is catchy and draws the attention very well. I think you focus on the point very well and is letting the readers know what you are writing about. Good job.
ReplyDeleteThink you did a really good job with this. I disagree with Tyler when he was dissing your second paragraph, you made your point and clearly explained what your essay's going to be about. I like that you put kind of a twist at the end by saying that why should scientists "blow money outside our own orbit when there are people sleeping on the streets.." Not only are you talking about the economic loss but also moral/social obligations that are being looked over and spent on something not as beneficial to society and humankind.
ReplyDeleteOoo I like the first paragraph, that is really interesting that a space invention gave us the idea of the tool to pry open doors and roofs to help save lives. Your second paragraph sounds good too, i can understand what the context of your paper will be about. Nice work!!
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